Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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