I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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