you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
