I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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