I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
