he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
