My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
