I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
