Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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