It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I can't turn off my feet"
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
