Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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