yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize