Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Randomize
