im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I smell stomach acid.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
