No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
