This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
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