New invention idea: vibrating tampons
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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