i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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