What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize