I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Success! We fucked roommates!
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
