he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
