i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
