Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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