just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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