piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
