the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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