Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize