Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
