She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
