The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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