haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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