my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
