I think im going to throw up on grandma
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
