shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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