Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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