Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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