the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
