Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Randomize
