I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
