no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Randomize
