he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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