Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
