I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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