Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
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