windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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