also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
