I like my sex mixed with concussions.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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