So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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