I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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