More tranny stories later!
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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